Here’s the full list of carefully curated words, phrases, and actions, you can look forward to for the third presidential debate between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. Tune in to this page for real time updates during the debate. (It starts at 9pm, US eastern time.)
Clinton—take a sip
Temperament: Clinton will make it clear that Trump fundamentally lacks the capacity to be president. We’ll note that your fundamental nature is to be thirsty.
Barack Obama: The outgoing president is the second-most popular Democrat around right now (after Michelle, naturally). Clinton will waste no time in reminding audiences whose legacy she’d like to carry on. Cheers!
Email: Did anyone doubt that Clinton would be forced to talk once again about the private email server she maintained while secretary of state? Savor this moment.
Khan: Khizr Khan, the father of a Muslim soldier killed in the line of duty, became a political sensation when he accused Trump of not knowing what it means to sacrifice for your country. Expect Clinton to cite his moral authority.
David Duke: The former Ku Klux Klan grand wizard is an enthusiastic Trump supporter, and Clinton doesn’t want you—or African American voters—to forget it.
Central Park Five: Donald Trump apparently still believes that five teenagers arrested for the rape of a woman in Central Park in 1989 are guilty, despite being exonerated by DNA evidence.
Elizabeth Warren: The popular populist progressive (say that three times fast) is something of a frenemy to Clinton, but the presidential candidate will presumably try to bask in the reflected glow of the senator’s recent torching of bank executives.
Nuclear codes: Do you want Donald Trump to have them? Clinton doesn’t.
“Midnight in America”: Ronald Reagan famously spoke of “morning in America,” but Clinton views the rhetoric of his inheritor as lacking similar optimism.
Lie: This one’s self-explanatory. Drink twice if you’re confused.
Love Trumps hate: Will Clinton roll out this hackneyed, somewhat coherent slogan? We predict, yes.
Dorothy: Clinton’s mother Dorothy Rodham, who emerged from a hardscrabble upbringing to build a middle-class family, is a frequent rhetorical touchstone.
I apologize: Clinton has received plenty of flack for some of her decisions, and we imagine she’ll attempt to show even more contrition to voters tonight.
Birther: Donald Trump was a long-time cheerleader in the racist movement that argued Barack Obama wasn’t born in the United States. Clinton is unlikely to let viewers forget this fact, whatever Trump’s latest claims may be.
*Coughing:* Clinton’s health is a subject of hysterical and often irrational speculation, so any signs of illness will no doubt inspire waves of dubious punditry. You’ll want to be buzzed.
Glass ceiling: Hillary Clinton would like to break it by being elected the first female president of the United States.
*Shimmying:* Clinton’s signature shoulder shake.
Casinos: Trump runs them, but not so well.
“There you go again”: The classic debate line once deployed by Ronald Reagan is a political fixture, and a convenient way for Clinton to defuse a Trump tangent.
Con: The frequent criticism of Trump as a flim-flam man will no doubt be a recurring theme this debate.
Grope: For some reason, this is the “polite” euphemism for Trump’s alleged sexual assaults.
Assange: The hacktivist trapped in an Ecuadorean embassy has become the key funnel to share documents hacked by Russia’s intelligence services.
Clinton—finish your drink
Deplorables: Hillary Clinton has been criticized for calling Trump’s supporters worthy of disgust (although polls show she wasn’t statistically that far off.) If she winds up saying the word again she’ll be going hard in the paint.
Lewinsky: Trump’s advisers have hinted that he’ll bring up Bill Clinton’s infidelities and Hillary’s alleged role in cleaning up after him. It’s less likely that she’ll directly reference the former White House intern.
It Takes a Village: If the corny title of Clinton’s famous book about families passes her lips, it’s a sign that she’s reaching for the familiar.
Millennial: Clinton has learned a lot from millennials, apparently, and definitely needs their votes. Will the “M word” cross her lips—or will she make a reference to snake people?
Anthony Weiner: The scandal-prone estranged husband of her top aide Huma Abedin is now embroiled in new allegations involving a teenager. If she’s forced to say his name we’ll know this debate has truly gone off the rails.
The Apprentice: If Clinton needs to harken back to Trump’s reality TV heyday, we’ll know she’s running out of ammo.
Ivana: For her sake, and for ours, we hope Clinton won’t feel the need to deflect questions about her own marriage by bringing up Trump’s messy divorce.
Melania: If Melania comes up, Clinton will either be embroiled in an argument about marriage or immigrant rights. Drink up.
Fingers: Donald’s are allegedly quite short, and he’s sensitive about it. Low blow!
White nationalism: Clinton calling out Trump for representing the white power movement represents her nuclear option.
Pussy: Trump, it seems, boasts about “grabbing” women “by the pussy.”
Trump—take a sip
Deplorable: Clinton said that roughly half of Trump’s supporters—the ones who are racist, sexist, and xenophobic—are “deplorable.” Trump will try to make this controversial quote seem less about him and more about her.
Email: Talk of Clinton’s never-ending email scandal is a Trump go-to.
Locker room: Trump insists his lewd comments caught on tape are just “locker-room banter.”
Crooked: Remember all those Trump supporters who wore “Hillary for Prison” T-shirts to his rallies? Trump does.
Benghazi: Ever heard of it? If not we’re jealous! Trump loves to blame Clinton for the 2012 attack on the US diplomatic compound in Benghazi, Libya, which occurred during her time as secretary of state.
“Believe me”: One of Trump’s signature phrases, usually deployed when he should not be believed.
Loser: A very useful catchall that can be used to describe virtually anyone who opposes Trump at this point. It might even include you!
Neurotic: A sexist dog whistle Trump has used recently to describe former Democratic National Committee chairwoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz and MSNBC host Mika Brzezinski, among other women.
China: China, China, China. Trump talks about China more than any other country outside the US, usually in reference to America’s “horrible” trade deals.
San Bernardino: The California town where terrorists wounded 22 people last year. Expect Trump to mention it as proof that America is no longer safe.
In hell: In the first debate, Trump said that minorities in America’s inner cities are “living in hell.”
Sarah Root: Trump has turned the death of this 21-year-old woman, killed earlier this year by a drunk driver who was also an unauthorized immigrant, into a talking point on the perils of open borders.
“Extremely careless”: How FBI director James Comey described Clinton’s handling of classified information on her private email server.
Weak: Trump is the put-down king, and this is one of his favorites.
Bernie Sanders: Clinton’s opponent in the Democratic primaries, Trump sometimes uses him to try to make Clinton look bad.
Tweet: Trump has been an infamous Twitter regular for years and loves to brag about it. (“That was a good tweet,” he told Matt Lauer, affirming his previously stated opinion on sexual assault in the military during the NBC presidential forum a few weeks ago.)
Weiner: Expect Trump to try to argue that Clinton’s relationship with Huma Abedin—Anthony Weiner’s estranged wife—somehow jeopardizes national security.
Polls: The ultimate cherry picker, Trump likes to brag about his standing in select presidential polls—that is, the ones that are more favorable to him.
*Enters Clinton’s personal space:* It would not be the first time this has happened to Hillary Clinton.
Repeal and replace: Jumping on the anti-Obama bandwagon, Trump has also embraced this generic Republican talking point about getting rid of Obamacare and replacing it with another plan (yet to be revealed).
*Sniffles:* Will Snifflin’ Don make another appearance?
Bill Clinton: Trump insists that Hillary’s husband is even lewder than he is.
Rigged: Something the election decidedly isn’t. Despite what Trump would have you believe.
Drugs: Is Hillary using performance-enhancing drugs to win the debates? Trump thinks she might be.
Firebomb (v.): A GOP office in North Carolina was firebombed last week. Trump has already accused the unknown assailants of “representing” Clinton’s campaign.
Trump—finish your drink
The N-word: We don’t think Trump will say it, but Don King did while introducing Trump last week. Who knows!
“Schlonged”: Last year, Trump said Clinton “got schlonged” by Barack Obama in the 2008 presidential election. While unlikely to win him any more fans, this phrase may play well with the virulently anti-Clinton crowd.
Bigly: A non-word Trump has used on more than one occasion. (He claims he’s saying “big league,” but we don’t buy it.)
Lewinsky: Will Trump dare to bring up Bill Clinton’s infamous sexual affair with then-22-year-old White House intern Monica Lewinsky?
I apologize: Trump never apologizes for anything, so drink up if he does.
Fingers: Many people are saying Trump has very short fingers. Trump disagrees!
Pocahontas: Trump’s uniquely racist nickname for senator Elizabeth Warren has come up in the past. Expect him to use it to deflate some of Warren’s current goodwill.
*Audience groans or boos:* This happened a few times during the Republican primary debates. Is it a good thing? Is it a bad thing? At least you’ll be drunk.