Brexit talks have officially begun, so leaders in London, Brussels, and beyond will have their work cut out for them. All eyes will be on British prime minister Theresa May in particular, as she tries to negotiate an amicable divorce from the EU within the two-year timeframe set out by the bloc’s rules.
Sources in Whitehall gave Quartz an exclusive peek at the prime minister’s personal schedule.* Needless to say, she plans on being very busy between now and March 2019.
March 29, 2017
- AM: Trigger Article 50.
- PM: Nando’s.
March 30, 2017
- Taste of Tennessee.
March 31, 2017
- is due. (Check ink levels on fax machine.)
- EU summit on Brexit.
- Eurovision watching party at Windsor Castle.
- state visit. Practice key phrase: “Mi casa es su casa, pero no se quede por mucho tiempo.”
- appearance are true, can ask him about a free-trade deal with Canada. Bond by showing him the selfie.
- new iPhone.
- After German federal election, send Merkel a note with congratulations/commiserations [delete as necessary].
- old pound coins. Exchange for dollars?
- St. Andrew’s Day: Set out-of-office message for all internal correspondence from “Sturgeon, Nicola.”
- old place!
- “Me” time.
- Downton Abbey film. Location apparently top secret—ask MI5 for address.
- Getting to Yes.
- Given the rising rates environment, rotate out of high-grade credit into high-beta equities. Consider 5s10s EUR swap curve steepener. Close 20-strike puts in Snap Inc shares. Buy rubles. Or gold. Probably gold.
- Consider getting a dog? Tell staff to research breeds according to these traits (in order): British, tenacious, cuddly.
- right? Check if Xi Jinping going anyway.)
- Spend a day at the England-India cricket match—our likely loss will put Indian trade reps in a good mood. Together, we can hit tariffs and non-tariff barriers for six!
- Burning Man.
- innovative British jam.
- Buy yen. And more gold.
- ancient Chinese ceramics from the British Museum might help sweeten the deal.
- Swiss Alps v. Sussex.
- Probably another Italian election sometime around now.
- Ask Sergio, that barista at Pret, whether he knows anyone at the Spanish trade delegation.
March 28, 2019
- fishing rights.
March 29, 2019
- Brexit day! 👋
March 30, 2019
* They didn’t, really. With additional sleuthing by Kabir Chibber, Nikhil Sonnad, and Cassie Werber.