corinne [12:25 PM]
oh man, what bad luck to run the plane right into the warehouse full of fuel
this guy cannot catch a break

ephrat [12:26 PM]
do planes really catch on fire from the first bullet tho? 1

foley [12:26 PM]

kira [12:27 PM]
yes, everyone currently has their correct face

zoe_schlanger [12:29 PM]
why don’t they just pull the trigger in these situations i really don’t get it

elijah [12:29 PM]
so i think you would still have time to get off a shot after you get shot 2

kira [12:30 PM]
is a jet engine an effective way to subdue a suspect? 3

elijah [12:30 PM]
i’m sort of unclear where he is. what is this fence/chamber thing?

zoe_schlanger [12:30 PM]
looks more like one of those test tunnels
you test things like bike wheels in chambers like that
like, a big fan on one end of a cylinder – something about wind/drag

elijah [12:31 PM]
nice – good for testing drag and also subduing murderers

kira [12:36 PM]
his skin didn’t even seem to react [to having a cigarette extinguished on it] 4

kira [12:37 PM]
wait this is important science. listen up

zoe_schlanger [12:37 PM]
3D printing yo. 5 got your blue laser, your red laser. you’re all set

foley [12:37 PM]

ephrat [12:38 PM]
here’s the real science 6

kira [12:38 PM]
here’s the real science hahaha

zoe_schlanger [12:38 PM]
“this plastic halloween mask is a state of the art…”

corinne [12:38 PM]
we’re just borrowing his face, man! be cool!

kira [12:38 PM]
there’s also like no recovery time for this procedure

foley [12:42 PM]
interested in knowing whether or not skin transplants now can grow hair 7

kira [12:46 PM]
boop! face off

elijah [12:46 PM]
what is this laser pen

foley [12:47 PM]
oooo it’s a play on the cyber knife maybe? 8 that was state of the art tech back then right?

kira [12:47 PM]
it’s increasingly clear to me they just said “do everything with lasers, people won’t know wtf lasers can actually do” 9

elijah [12:48 PM]
can you stay alive with your face off? 10

kira [12:48 PM]
GREAT question

ephrat [12:48 PM]
just massage it back in

elijah [12:49 PM]
clearly not psychologically ready. what’s the psychological recovery from getting a new face? 11

kira [12:50 PM]
microchip on your larynx!

elijah [12:50 PM]
is this a thing we can do? this seems like somewhat reasonable tech 12

foley [12:52 PM]
wow there is a surgery you can get for this!
but i don’t think we have anything that can sit on your larynx just yet

zoe_schlanger [12:53 PM]

ephrat [12:53 PM]
prisons with magnetic field floors? still a dream for the brilliant future I think

zoe_schlanger [12:53 PM]
being under constant magnetism of that strength can’t be good for your health, right?

ephrat [12:54 PM]
being in prison is bad for health generally. so…

kira [12:55 PM]
i feel like if they don’t care about the geneva convention they’re ok with magnet boots hurting prisoner health

kira [12:58 PM]
ok so [Troy] is…up. whether you could live without your face skin is a v relevant question

foley [12:59 PM]
smoking in hospital

zoe_schlanger [1:00 PM]
smoking in hospital WITHOUT A FACE

foley [1:00 PM]

corinne [1:01 PM]
the babysitter just walked in. Explained we were watching Face Off, she said, Oh, that happened to my cousin

elijah [1:01 PM]

ephrat [1:02 PM]
wait what?

kira [1:02 PM]

corinne [1:02 PM]
got into a car accident, they had to peel back his face to remove all the glass, then sew it back up. he has no sense of smell anymore

elijah [1:02 PM]

kira [1:02 PM]

corinne [1:02 PM]
so that answers some of our questions

foley [1:02 PM]
that’s incredible

zoe_schlanger [1:02 PM]

zoe_schlanger [1:03 PM]
also [Troy] just said his memory loss is like “a tab of bad quantrex.” quantrex, it seems, is a solvent

elijah [1:03 PM]
so when it goes bad…

zoe_schlanger [1:04 PM]
so that’s basically… poppers?

kira [1:13 PM]
good point about chins. i feel like a butt chin would be hard to recreate in a face transplant

elijah [1:13 PM]
hm is butt chin a bone shape thing, or a muscle/skin thing? 14

corinne [1:16 PM]
yeah this is where the movie falls apart

elijah [1:18 PM]
you mean cause of the unbelievable science?

corinne [1:19 PM]
no, i meant the marriage

they make clear that this family doesn’t communicate much, but  it should raise alarm bells that suddenly he is a completely different person

kira [1:19 PM]
but i mean it’s not like if your spouse suddenly started acting really weird you’d be like
“…….are you someone else wearing my husband’s face?”
i mean NOW i would
bc i’ve seen face/off

corinne [1:19 PM]

elijah [1:19 PM]
trust no one

kira [1:19 PM]
i think the more relevant question
is whether you’d recognize your spouse’s junk

corinne [1:20 PM]
key question this movie completely fails to explore

ephrat [1:20 PM]
she hasn’t seen it in two months per [her] journal

foley [1:20 PM]
penile transplants were developed in part for vets!!!

elijah [1:20 PM]
did they do that procedure?

kira [1:20 PM]
big oversight in a sea of very scientifically accurate plot points imho

elijah [1:21 PM]
seems like something Troy wouldve talked about a whole bunch by now

zoe_schlanger [1:22 PM]
casual sulfuric acid laying around the prison

foley [1:22 PM]
okay does that actually happen when you shoot it? 15

zoe_schlanger [1:26 PM]
you’d die if you jumped into water from that high! 16

kira [1:26 PM]
even if you scissored your legs in slow motion like that?

zoe_schlanger [1:29 PM]
…so hold up
he just swam to shore

kira [1:29 PM]
yes, those are the rules of chases. if you jump off a large platform into the ocean you’re free, they can’t pursue you anymore

zoe_schlanger [1:32 PM]
alright what do we think the prescription is

kira [1:32 PM]
what would you dissolve in water…

zoe_schlanger [1:32 PM]
lil antacid

kira [1:33 PM]
wow there are multiple posts on this
consensus seems to be ketamine

zoe_schlanger [1:35 PM]
well certainly looks like he’s on ketamine

elijah [1:35 PM]
i think it’s kinda PCP-like 17

elijah [1:50 PM]
wait didnt they keep their bodies?

corinne [1:50 PM]
liposuction, hair transplants – might as well be a body swap

foley [1:55 PM]
wait if troy killed the doctor who gave him the operation….aren’t they both screwed?
what a pickle this is

ephrat [2:00 PM]
is that like the Theranos blood test? 18

corinne [2:00 PM]
scoop alert elizabeth holmes got the idea from Face Off

elijah [2:00 PM]
whoa amazing if true

kira [2:01 PM]
and applied the same standards of science
“but it worked in face/off!”

elijah [2:01 PM]
love the idea of combing through 90s movies for startup ideas

kira [2:01 PM]
richie rich – the smellmaster 9000 19

kira [2:14 PM]
if you die
can you still have your face transplanted back?

foley [2:15 PM]
this is the longest i have been nauseated without actually being sick

zoe_schlanger [2:16 PM]
so if you shoot a propane tank – that’s 100% chance of big kaboom, yes? 20

ephrat [2:17 PM]
that’s what I meant earlier — the plane also exploded fast … just on a shooting … seems unsafe

zoe_schlanger [2:17 PM]
also how about safety glass. if you shoot a windshield with safety glass, will it completely fall apart? did they have safety glass in 97?

elijah [2:18 PM]
i wonder if propane tank tech has improved. like, is it harder to shoot through, now that we’ve seen Face/Off and know what can happen?

foley [2:20 PM]
i’ve always had so many questions about explosions in water 21

foley [2:22 PM]

kira [2:22 PM]
they literally lasered your faces like it was nothing
and you’re acting like a little knife cut is going to be a big deal

elijah [2:22 PM]
yea come on. the tech clearly allows for total face reconstruction
all you need is that plastic vacuum mask thing

corinne [2:22 PM]
wait what – how do they know
what did i miss

elijah [2:23 PM]
cause of the Theranos device

kira [2:23 PM]
elizabeth holmes saves the day

ephrat [2:23 PM]
I knew she would redeem herself

foley [2:24 PM]
how much therapy do you think the family needs now

kira [2:24 PM]
no they’re great now
closer than ever

ephrat [2:25 PM]
they seem very resilient

corinne [2:25 PM]
just going to sweep the whole “i accidentally slept with our son’s killer because of your work thing” under the rug

foley [2:25 PM]
“sorry i shot you”

elijah [2:26 PM]
yea im pretty sure this is like 10 years of therapy

corinne [2:26 PM]
hey guys got us a new kid

ephrat [2:26 PM]
so it all worked out

foley [2:26 PM]
‘to replace our old one’

kira [2:26 PM]
“can we keep him?”

ephrat [2:26 PM]
better than ever : )

kira [2:26 PM]

zoe_schlanger [2:26 PM]
casually didn’t ask your spouse

ephrat [2:26 PM]
he knows what she needs

kira [2:26 PM]

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