We Put The Apple Watch In A Blender
We Flung The Apple Watch From The Top Of A Skyscraper
We Beat The Apple Watch With A Mallet And Some Baseball Bats
We Kept On Hammering The Apple Watch Even After The Cameras Stopped Rolling
We Swung Our Primitive Tools Upon The Much-Hyped Wearable Until Our Arms Were Sore From Overexertion
We Let Forth the Basest Yowls Of Primal Satisfaction As We Reduced The Instrument To Its Sensors And Chips
We Finally Stopped Pummeling The Apple Watch As A Blood-Orange Sun Set Behind The Hills To The West
We Caught Our Breaths And Regarded The Destroyed Technology At Our Feet
We Swept Up The Innards Of The Apple Watch And A Strange Silence Overtook Us
We Huddled Above The Pulverized Apple Watch, Daring Not Look Into One Another Eyes
We Arrived At Work The Next Morning, An Unspoken Air Of Regret Between Us
We Checked Our Schedule: ‘9AM: Run Over The Apple Watch With A Steamroller’
We Had Not Slept The Night Before. The Moon, And The Memories Of Ourselves, Stirred Us Awake
We Argued Over Who Would Operate The Machine And Flatten The Digital Timepiece
We Pushed Each Other, And Tore One Another’s Garments, As The Apple Watch Awaited Its Obliteration
Our Assistant Interrupted Us. Our YouTube Video “Apple Watch DESTROYED By Dental Implements” Had Just Crossed One Million Views
It Meant Nothing. In The End, It Was The Apple Watch Who Had Destroyed Us.
We Were The Beaten.
We Were The Flung.
We Were The Blended.
What Next? What Next? What Next?
We Dropped The Apple Watch In A Deep Fryer.