A gang of idiots somehow managed to steal $80 million of rare artifacts from English museums

“If you think the Hatton Gardens break-in was big, this will blow that out of the water,” lead investigator Adrian Green, of Durham Police, said, according to the BBC.

While the loot was far greater than the Hatton Gardens heist, the museum gang’s level of criminal expertise was not nearly as impressive.

• In the first attempted raid in January 2012, the gang hired a man to steal a Ming dynasty sculpture at the Oriental Museum in Durham. The hired accomplice didn’t get far—staff at the museum caught him after he stuffed the sculpture in his rucksack.
• A month later, in what the court described as a “fiasco,” four hired accomplices attempted to steal a rhino horn from the Castle Museum in Norwich. The men didn’t apparently take into account how heavy the rhino horn—valued at up to £500,000—would be and dropped it as a result. The men fled, but the police later caught one after the gang left behind a car number plate with an incriminating fingerprint.
• The gang’s luck doesn’t improve in March 2012. They hire another group of criminals to steal a rhino horn libation cup worth about £60,000 at an auction house but the public foiled them—again. Three were arrested nearby, but a separate group of robbers did end up stealing a bamboo cup worth £20,000.
• Things finally start to get better in April 2012; the gang has their most successful robbery yet. Hired criminals are used to rob the Oriental Museum in Durham again. After smashing through the wall, the men steal a 1769 jade bowl and a porcelain figurine worth up to £2 million.
• But the good times don’t last long. The group hides the precious items in a wasteland near an industrial estate, but the men are unable to find them when they returned a few days later. One member was seen by a witness searching for the item, while making frantic phone calls. The men were arrested and the police eventually found the objects.
• The gang finally hit the jackpot a few days later (April 13, 2012) when they successfully stole 18 jade artifacts valued at least £15 million from Cambridge University’s Fitzwilliam Museum. They were all captured on CCTV smashing through the vault, but the valuable items were already taken via a car to someone else waiting to receive them.