First-time parents, by definition, are clueless. They intensely study, and worry, about every little thing. With a second child, they adapt, cutting corners to manage life with two little beasts. By the third or fourth, the editing becomes hyper-precise: it’s not about options, but efficiency.
Ask any parent of three or more kids, and they have stories that would give first-timers palpitations. Like the dad who left his newborn (#3) on the kitchen counter when he dashed out the door to take his other kids (#1 and #2) to preschool. “He was in a carseat,” he said. “He was fine.”
And how do those third and fourth kids turn out later in life? Very well adjusted. (Full disclosure: I am a third).
This is what parenting looks like as it evolves, or devolves:
Kid # 1: Research sleep-training methods. Talk to pediatrician. Allocate a week for sleep training regimen. Monitor sleep patterns. Fret.
Kid #1: Scrub it with warm soap and water every times it falls out of his tiny little mouth.
Kid #1: 7:00pm.
Kid #1: Organic, washed, cleaned, Vitamixed. Homemade everything.
Kid #1: Petit Bateau, Baby Gap $GPS, Hannah Anderssen.
Kid #1: Educational, wooden, Nordic.
Kid #1: Classical, in utero.
Kid #1: Complete Beatrix Potter collection before one-month mark.
Kid #1: Visit every nursery possible. Interview school heads like they are potential candidates for president. Survey neighbors. Study up on Maria Montessori.
Kid #1: Strike perfect balance between “helping” and “enabling.”
