A rating of countries, according to Donald Trump

The Good, the Bad, the Greatest.
The Good, the Bad, the Greatest.
Image: AP Photo/Evan Vucci
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Donald Trump’s first address at the UN general assembly was a 41-minute long declaration of US power and military prowess, a celebration of sovereignty over international collaboration, and a threatening condemnation of America’s enemies. Though Trump bragged about his country being stronger and greater than ever, the speech had a dark feeling, not dissimilar from his inaugural address, painting a picture of a troubled world.

At the UN, Trump took the opportunity to share his view of an international community broadly divided into very bad, bad, sad and good countries. (Plus one that is the greatest of them all.) The state of the world, according to POTUS:

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Very Bad

North Korea | “No one has shown more contempt for other nations and for the wellbeing of their own people than the depraved regime in North Korea,” says Trump. Unless Kim Jong-un, whom he calls Rocket Man, backs up, the US “will have no choice but to totally destroy North Korea.”

Syria | Once a fan of Bashar al-Assad as an opponent of ISIS, Trump is now strongly against his “criminal regime,” which “used chemical weapons against his own citizens” and whose actions “shock the conscience of every decent person.”

Venezuela | Venezuela is socialist, hence bad. Its regime, Trump says, “has brought a once-thriving nation to the brink of total collapse.” Beyond the sanctions imposed by the UN, the US is “prepared to take further action” should president Nicolás Maduro persist in imposing authoritarian rule. 

Cuba | Like Venezuela, and the Soviet Union, Cuba implemented socialism, which “delivered anguish and devastation and failure.”

Iran | The Iranian government is, Trump says, a “corrupt dictatorship” that supports the Hezbollah and al-Assad’s regime, and attacks its neighbors—including Israel. The country’s citizens are good, however, and “other than the vast military power of the United States…Iran’s people are what their leaders fear the most.” 

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Russia | In his speech, Trump said “we must reject threats to sovereignty, from the Ukraine to the South China Sea.” The South China Sea situation is very complex, and the threats to sovereignty come to various nations, depending on which version of the events one subscribes to (Brunei, China, Malaysia, the Philippines, Taiwan and Vietnam). Ukraine is easier: Russia is to blame.

Yemen | Civil war and famine, can’t be a good combination. Yemen isn’t bad per se in Trump’s world—just in a bad situation, one that Syria is making worse (civil war) but America is helping (famine).

Iraq | It’s the home of ISIS, therefore bad news, but the US has been making “big gains” towards defeating the terrorist group. “Our country has achieved more against ISIS in the last eight months than it has in many, many years combined,” said Trump.

Afghanistan | Also under the hold of terrorists, but America has a “new strategy for victory.”

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South Sudan | Famine isn’t good, but the US is bringing relief.

Somalia | Also has a famine, also can thank the US for its humanitarian assistance.

Yemen | Yemen’s not just bad, it’s also sad. The US is bringing relief from famine there, too.

Nigeria | Also struggling with famine, also benefiting from US humanitarian efforts.

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Saudi Arabia | Trump was “greatly honored” to be there and address Arab and Muslim regions.

Israel | A peaceful neighbor of Iran.

Jordan | Hosted refugees of the Syrian war that Trump referred to as terrorists and tried to ban from the US. He is thankful.

China | Joined the vote to impose sanctions on North Korea, which was good.

Russia | Also voted for sanctions, which likely evens out its Ukraine problem.

Turkey | Also praiseworthy for hosting Syrian refugees.

Lebanon | Another champion of Syrian refugees, which Trump appreciates.

France | Free, because its patriotic citizens fought for its freedom.

Poland | Safe, because patriotic Poles died to save it.

Britain | Strong, because patriotic Brits made it so.

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The United States of America | Despite the hurricanes, America is doing splendidly. “Fortunately, the United States has done very well since Election Day last November 8th,” said Trump, who listed stock market, employment, and growth “like our country has not seen in a long time.” Also, the military budget he has proposed is $700 billion larger now, and the US military “will soon be the strongest it has ever been.” The world can only be thrilled about it.