TORQUE CONVERTERS

There are a lot of great band names in the 58-page list of Chinese products targeted for US import tariffs

A scene from Tariffest 2018, featuring Torpedo Tubes and The Transceivers.
A scene from Tariffest 2018, featuring Torpedo Tubes and The Transceivers.
Image: Reuters/Wolfgang Rattay
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The nascent trade war between the United States and China continues to escalate. A few days ago, China announced tariffs on 128 American products, covering close to $3 billion worth of US exports. Now, the Trump administration is preparing to retaliate, proposing import tariffs on 1,300 categories of Chinese products worth some $50 billion.

Trade wars are no good. But there is something positive to come out of this: hidden in the more obscure corners of the the 1,300 industrial products targeted by Trump are some of the best band names we’ve seen in a while. Who wouldn’t be intrigued by a black metal band called “Salts of Triethanolamine”? Or what about “Parts of Flange”, which we imagine is a sprawling, 10-member prog rock group, or maybe one of those silly jam bands where all the lyrics are about fictional animals.

Here is a selection of killer band names in the list of proposed tariffs (pdf), including some ideas about what the groups would sound like.